Alexandra "Alix" Ninfo

May 22, 2022

CHARLOTTE – Alexandra (Alix) Ninfo, 57, died at home on Sunday, May 22, 2022 from complications caused by her lifelong affliction with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (Vascular EDS or vEDS).  The only child of the late Julia Hopkins Muehlstein and Herbert Muehlstein, Alexandra was born on October 4, 1964 in the borough of Manhattan in New York City where she spent most of her childhood. 

There, she formed friendships as early as two years of age that lasted her entire life.  Friendships so close that they could only be described as “family”.  Even though Alix was an only child, she always knew the love of sisters and brothers who adored her.

Alix began her education at Central Presbyterian Church on the upper east side of Manhattan where she attended pre-school and kindergarten.  She next attended elementary school at Chapin School for girls also on the upper east side.  For high school Alix went to Riverdale Country School in the Bronx where she graduated in 1982.  She then attended Hampshire College in Amherst, MA where she was a History of Art and Fine Arts major.  When her parents divorced and Julia returned to her native England, Alix followed.  She attended Ravensbourne College of Art & Design in Chislehurst, England and completed her Certificate for Foundation year in Product Design, Furniture and Ceramics.

Upon returning to New York City in 1985, Alix met Matthew Ninfo when they were both employed at Broadway Video.  Although there was an instant attraction between the two, Alix preferred to keep their relationship “friendly” as long as they worked together.  Alix left Broadway Video to return to England to care for her mother when she fell ill, but after nurturing her back to health she returned to New York.  At that point Alix and Matthew continued where they left off and quickly fell in love and moved in together.  They married on April 11, 1992 at the United Nations chapel in Manhattan.  Living on East 17th Street in Gramercy Park on the lower east side of Manhattan Alix and Matthew also enjoyed the retreat of their upstate house in Marbletown, Ulster County New York in the foothills of the Catskill mountains.  During that time, Alix (known professionally as Alexandra Hopkins) worked for several companies in the television industry before successfully transitioning to banking, working as assistant to the managing director of syndicated loans at Societe Generale.  Unfortunately, in 2000 she became ill and was diagnosed with vEDS and declared disabled very reluctantly giving up her professional career.  She preferred to call it “early retirement”.

In 2001 Alix and Matthew were forced to give up their homes in Manhattan and upstate and relocated to the north fork of Long Island, first living in the hamlet of Mattituck and eventually settling in Cutchogue.  In 2004 Alix’s mother returned to the United States to be closer to her only child in her later years and lived with them in Cutchogue. After Julia died in 2015, Alix and Matthew left the north fork but remained on Long Island, eventually landing in the village of Patchogue. Finally, Alix and Matthew moved to Charlotte, North Carolina in March of 2022 to start the next chapter in their life together.

Alix was an extremely intelligent, loving and caring individual.  She had a keen mind and a healthy appetite for knowledge especially when it came to art, literature, music, nature and cooking.  In her professional life, she was a rapid learner and always excelled at applying her knowledge and skills to whatever project she was working on.  Even when she became disabled her thirst for knowledge endured.  She was a voracious and fast reader and loved all different types of books sometimes reading several different ones at a time.  She served on the board of The Cutchogue, New Suffolk Free Library and was known as one of the library’s power users.  The librarians always knew which books to order next based on what she was requesting.  Alexandra was a “foodie” who loved to cook and believed that food was an expression of her love.  In addition to a well-organized collection of family recipes, she had an impressive collection of cookbooks old and new that she used often to the delight of her family and friends.  Her collection was so extensive, her kitchens always had to have room for a bookcase, just for cookbooks. 

Alix had a fascination with nature and a love for all living things.  She took great joy in watching and learning about all the forms of life she could observe and nurture in her garden, at the beach or on walks in a nature preserve.   She especially loved to feed and nurture caterpillars and watch them transform into butterflies.  When it came to nurturing living things, she especially loved and cared for her cats and dogs.  Alix hated puppy mills and strongly believed in animal rescues, especially those that fostered cats and dogs so that they always had a loving home while waiting to be adopted.  She adopted several pets from rescues through the years, most recently her Pomeranians, Dougal and Pippin.  Due to her nurturing nature, their health and wellbeing was always a priority.  She lovingly showed them off on their own Instagram feed and was proud of their growing list of followers.

Alix leaves behind a long list of people who love and adore her and will miss her terribly, including her husband of 30 years, Matthew Ninfo; mother-in-law Aileen Tyler; sisters-in-law Virginia Goss, Peggy Cillo, and Aileen Rosin; brothers-in-law, Salvatore Ninfo and Philip Cillo.  Also surviving are her niece Sascha Rosin and four nephews, David Goetz, Edward Goss, Thomas Cillo and Michael Cillo; and a great niece Ariana Goss as well as many adopted family/friends who have loved her for her entire life.

Memorials may be offered in memory of Alix to Yorkie911 Rescue, Inc., PO Box 2627, North Babylon, NY 11703 ( https://www.yorkie911rescue.com/) or True North Pet Rescue Mission https://www.truenorthrescue.org/.

Arrangements are in the care of Kenneth W. Poe Funeral & Cremation Service, 1321 Berkeley Ave., Charlotte, NC 28204; (704) 641-7606. Online condolences may be shared at www.kennethpoeservices.com.

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